How To Get Over a Breakup
Updated on July 12, 2021 by Amber & The Team
In this post we might recommend products that we find helpful or cute. Read our full disclosure here.
Breakups are one of the most difficult times in our lives, especially if they bring along feelings of rejection, abandonment or alter our day to day activities.
What is even harder to deal with, is… The post-breakup pain, which impossible to avoid completely if you actually cared about the person. Yet specialists in the field suggest that a couple of steps can be taken in order to get over a breakup as smoothly as possible.
Read on to find out how to get over a breakup with as little pain as possible.
How To Get Over a Breakup
1) Share Your Thoughts And Feelings With a Person You Trust
The first step towards healing and properly getting over a breakup is to talk about it. A good friend, a parent, a co-worker or anyone who wants to hear a story can help you with this task.
Reaching out to others will remind you about the beauty of spending time with those that truly appreciate you. Moreover, talking about your problems can allow you to easily discover how to manage your new role as a free, single person.
2) Don’t Isolate Yourself Mentally
After a breakup, people tend to isolate themselves and spend a lot of time indoors. This can only worsen those feelings of rejection and sadness. Psychologists recommend choosing a hobby and doing pleasant activities that you like, and that don’t bring back too many memories about your ex.
You can also use the accumulated negative energy to create a positive turn in your life. Developing new skills, bettering existent ones and meeting new people with similar interests, are all steps that will make you feel less vulnerable.
Spending quality time enjoying what you like, and what makes you feel like things are getting better, is the best thing you can do get over a breakup faster.
3) Avoid Contacting Your Ex
The tendency of texting or calling your ex after a breakup is fueled by strong emotions. Because of the intense pain we feel, we are prone to go back and beg for attention and love.
So, if you want to get over a breakup in a positive way, don’t contact your ex. It might be a great idea to delete his / her number and stop following their social media accounts, too. Place a wall between you two and when you feel like crossing it, think about all the reasons why your relationship ended.
4) Admit That It Takes Time To Move On
One of the major problems psychologists identify in breakup situations is that one of the partners has a lot of trouble in understanding that healing requires time. We usually presume that everything will get back to normal immediately, but this is not how it goes.
To heal get over a break and heal emotionally, we need time. The most important thing you can do after a breakup is to be kind to yourself and avoid adding unnecessary feelings of anticipation.
5) Seek The Advice Of a Therapist
How to get over a breakup without falling apart? Well, lets remind ourselves that therapists are besy trained to help people in hard situations.
If pain feels unbearable, please consider booking an appointment with a therapist. You will have someone to talk to and at the same time your therapist will ease your healing path. You will be encouraged to allow hurtful feelings to exist and pass by. At the same time, you will discover a lot of things about yourself and your reactions to things that make you feel vulnerable.
6) To Get Over a Breakup Faster, Avoid Alcohol
After a breakup, some people tend to run and hide in a world that blocks the pain away. But specialists say that indulging in alcohol it is not the best idea. Same goes with using a similar drug to numb the pain. It is only a temporary solution, after which you might actually feel even worse.
7) Spend Time In Nature Or New Places
Getting fresh air and sitting in the sun can boost your mood, diminish those feelings of sadness, and help you to get over a breakup.
Take a stroll through a park, go on a short trip to the mountains, visit a beach. All these activities will help you change your surroundings, make you feel happier, and help you think less and less about the breakup itself.
Also, you can opt for physical outdoor activities such as jogging or riding the bike. Spending time in nature and doing these activities will release endorphins and contribute to faster emotional healing.
8) Read Books And Studies bout Relationships And Breakups
To gain a better understanding of how to get over a breakup, I personally recommend reading some literature about relationships, breakups and healing. No matter if it is a book, or an article, spending some time researching such information might ease your healing process. It will also show you how important self-help is and that other people went through this, too.
How To Get Over a Breakup If You Have To See Your Ex Often
If you happen to work with your ex, or if there are other places you constantly have to meet each other, it can be a bit harder for both of you to get over a breakup.
To help yourself in this situation:
- Look for a way to minimize this contact (for example, switch up your work hours);
- Spend more time after work communicating with other people;
- Do not skip various occasions, parties and celebrations just because your ex might be there – go and enjoy yourself!
– – –
After a relationship ends, we feel like our entire world just collapsed. It takes time to understand that this is not actually true. We as human beings are sensitive and vulnerable – this is why the process of getting over a breakup comes with a bundle of pain.
The most important helpers in this situation are time and self-compassion. Allow yourself to go through the healing process and try to do it in the healthiest ways possible. Take care of yourself as much as you can, even when you have to get over a breakup.