Female-Led Relationship: How It Works & Tips To Make Your FLR Thrive

It’s important that you and your partner are open and honest from the beginning.

Researched, written by Amber & The Team
Updated on July 9, 2023

Female Led Relationship Couple

// We recommend helpful products in our articles. Read our full disclosure here.

Your subscription could not be saved. Please try again.
Your subscription has been successful!

It's good to KNOW.

Subscribe to our newsletter for new, health-improving topics.

There are many different types of relationships, and people have discovered new ways to partner up more recently.

While some of these relationship structures may feel unusual or even unbalanced, they all have their benefits.

In fact, there are several that you may find quite interesting.

For example, the female-led relationship is something that’s becoming increasingly common.


What Is a Female-Led Relationship?


A female-led relationship is a partnership where the woman has the most power.

The woman takes on an alpha role in the dynamic by assuming primary responsibility for monitoring communication, setting expectations, making rules and boundaries clear, initiating physical contact, and leading in problem-solving.

The woman – not the man – has the primary role in the relationship.

She makes the rules and is in charge of the relationship.


Why Do People Choose a Female-Led Relationship?


A female-led relationship can be a fun and fantastic way to get to know each other in a new way or explore a relationship that’s different.

It can be a way for both men and women to explore themselves, find out what they like, or discover what they need in a relationship.

It can also be a way for people to get more fulfillment in personal moments.

Female-led relationships or relationships where women are leading are not new.

In fact, the research on female-led relationships dates back to 1991.

It is not a new phenomenon.

In fact, it’s been around for quite a while and has been associated with positive outcomes such as greater relationship joy.


What It’s Like to Be in a Female-Led Relationship


Female-led relationships are becoming more common.

Many people who participate in these relationships tend to feel that they are much healthier than standard relationships.

Why is this the case?

Let’s take a look at what it’s like to be in a woman-led relationship.


What Does a Female-Led Relationship Look Like?


A female-led relationship is about power.

There are no hard and fast rules about how a relationship like this should look.

Some couples might have a completely equal relationship, while others may have a relationship where the woman has all the power.

Some relationships have a clearly physical focus, while others are purely romantic.

Other relationships are a combination of both.


How Is a Female-Led Relationship Different from a Standard One?


The term “standard relationship” is mostly used here as a comparison.

A standard relationship is one where the man and woman are on equal ground.

In these relationships, both partners make most of the important decisions, and neither person takes a lead.

Most people who are in a female-led relationship will tell you that it’s an entirely different experience from a standard relationship.

A female-led relationship can look like a standard one, though.

The difference between the two is in the dynamic between the two partners.

In a female-led relationship, one partner (female) takes the lead, while the other follows.

It’s important to note, however, that the term “following” here doesn’t mean that the person is doing nothing.


Why Are Female-Led Relationships Becoming More Common?


The main reason that female-led relationships are becoming more common is that people are starting to realize their benefits.

Some of the FLR benefits are:

  • Increased closeness. A lot of people in female-led relationships claim to be happier with their bedroom life than people in standard relationships.
  • Increased trust. People in female-led relationships tend to feel much more trust in their partner than people in standard relationships.
  • Better communication. People in female-led relationships may communicate better than people in standard relationships.
  • Greater equality. Studies have shown that women who take the lead in a relationship are less likely to have control issues than men who take the lead in a relationship.
  • Better cooperation. Better communication leads to better problem-solving.

    People in female-led relationships are more likely to solve problems with their partners instead of trying to do everything on their own.


Problems That Often Arise in Female-Led Relationships


  • Jealousy. Jealousy is an issue that often arises in standard relationships, too.

    In female-led relationships, jealousy can be lessened by openly talking about your feelings and expectations.

  • Resentment. When one partner feels like they are following too much, they can start to feel resentful.

    Resentment can destroy any relationship, no matter what type of relationship it is.

Note: communication is the key!

If you are in a female-led relationship, make sure that you and your partner are communicating well.

If you feel like your partner is following you too much, or vice versa, communicate your feelings.

If you feel like you are controlling your partner too much, talk to them about it.

Don’t let these problems fester.

They can destroy your relationship if left unchecked.


6 Tips for Female-Led Relationships


Female-led relationships are on the rise and becoming more normalized.

If you’re interested in exploring this type of relationship, here are 6 female-led relationship tips.


1. Healthy FLR is always built on trust and communication


In any relationship, open and honest communication is vital.

Communication can be verbal or non-verbal, written, or even digital (using apps).

Partners should be willing to explore different ways of communicating, like daily check-ins, journaling, and setting aside time for communication about the relationship and your feelings.

When communication breaks down, resentment and misunderstanding can creep in, and a relationship can become unhealthy very quickly.


2. Consent is everything in a female-led relationship


In a female-led relationship, consent is the key.

If you’re in a female-led relationship, you should consent to everything that goes on in the relationship, and your partner too. A female-led relationship requires full consent from all partners.


3. Be open about your preferences


If you’re in a female-led relationship, it’s important to be transparent and open about your wishes.

Your partner should know what you like and what you don’t like.

If you have an idea you’d like to try, it’s important to share it with your partner.

If you have an idea that you don’t want to try, it’s also important to share that with your partner.

A female-led relationship is about communicating your wishes so that you both have a fulfilling relationship physically and mentally.

If you’re in a male-led relationship, it’s important to be transparent and open about what you want, too!

You don’t want to put pressure on your partner.

Instead, you want to create a safe space for your partner to open up to you about their likes.


4. Establish your FLR rules together


Partners in a female-led relationship should establish rules together.

Rules can be anything from having a curfew to what’s allowed when it comes to different activities.

Rules are different for every relationship, and you should discuss what rules will work best for you and your partner.

Some partners may feel more comfortable with fewer rules, while others may feel more comfortable with more.

Even if you both have different rules, you can still work together.


5. Don’t let jealousy in


In a female-led relationship, both partners should strive to keep jealousy from controlling them.

If you find yourself feeling jealous, it’s important to talk to your partner about it.

Jealousy can turn into resentment if you don’t address it, and resentment can really harm a relationship.

Jealousy can also lead to other issues, like controlling behavior and anger.

Partners should also discuss what they’d like to do if they feel jealous.


6. Try new things together and have fun!


In any type of relationship, it’s important to have fun together.

This can include spending time together, creating traditions, and doing fun activities together.

This can also include having private moments – they are a big part of any relationship, and it should be something that you both enjoy and feel comfortable with.


Bottom line


A female-led relationship is a romantic relationship where the woman is the one with the most power, and she is in charge of the relationship.

If you are interested in this relationship model, it’s important that you and your partner are open and honest from the very beginning. This is important because it allows you and your partner to know what both of you are signing up for.

Co-authors at ShineSheets.com

"We love to research problems, examine studies, analyze solutions, and present to you the best ideas that make life better. You can learn about our editorial standards here.

Have suggestions or feedback to share? Send us a message."